Burning this letters.

read about tengkualif at eyebagsnredbulls.wordpress.com

cause

I am looking forward to January 2010.
I am excited already about starting a new job with priority number 1 saving as much and working hard.
Goals, check.
Achieving it, time will tell.

It's 645am. :( So late

2007 and 2008 was not a good year for me.
2007 and 2008 suck so much it made me so much stronger.
2007 and 2008 people treated as if I did not exist.
2007 and 2008 people spat on me and walked all over me.
2007 and 2008 I stoop at a level so low I will never be a man again.
2007 and 2008 suck.

And I thank 2007 and 2008.
Thank you for moulding me into the guy I never thought I will be.
Thank you for making me learn to walk away.
Thank you for making me be the strong guy.
Thank you for making me realise that no boy, no girl deserves to walk all over me.
Thank you for making me realise that I have friends who care.
Thank you for the bad memories; that I will always remember that I am not that weak anymore.
Thank you for leaving me alive; Thank God.
Thank you for making me realise that I, knowing if I put my heart and soul into whatever I want, all my dreams will be a reality, and knowing that no one, can pull me down, or hold me back.
Thank you.

I love my family.
I love my girlfriend.
I love my friends.

What is the true act of forgiving someone?

Where to next? Destination beautiful you.

Growing up, falling in love, getting a job, providing for the family, staying true to your significant other, being there for your friends.


Sacrificing your whole life.

Life's all about giving. So who's going to give it back to you?

A brief introduction by me, about me.

I am Tengku Muhammad Alif. I am currently jobless. But playing Left 4 Dead is currently my new job. It doesn't pay well; infact, it doesn't pay at all. If you still consider sitting down at Suntec City Convention Starbucks, or as the partners like to call it SB-SN, as a job, well, it isn't. But they are paying me drinks. I guess I should be able to survive with an ice tall 4 pump hazelnut latte everyday.


I've left this journal abandoned for quite some time. I do not know what to write but I have so many on my mind.


Where should I start?

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I have so many things to say but I just don't know how to say it out of fear.
What is your biggest fear?

Take care of myself. Please.

Gi race sua

cow⋅ard
   /ˈkaʊərd/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [kou-erd] Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun
1. a person who lacks courage in facing danger, difficulty, opposition, pain, etc.; a timid or easily intimidated person.
–adjective
2. lacking courage; very fearful or timid.
3. proceeding from or expressive of fear or timidity: a coward cry.




Need I say more?
I hope that one day karma bites you in the ass. And thinking of maturity, makes you think, doesn't mean you're old means you're fucking matured. Infact I came across a guy who is probably half more to his age before he dies of face cancer behave like a fucking 3 year old. And the girl, L O FUCKING L, let's not even get started with her cause coward, liar, backstaber is all I can say about this wonderful girl.


Oh what? You're going to run off and complain and whine? Please don't hit me. Or cut off my legs. Or kill me with ur looks. Or call people to kill me. :'(









L-M-FUCKING-A-O.

He protected you, yet you stab him silently from the back.
This time, you just had to fucking stab him again. Learn to blame yourself before you fucking blame him. Learn to fucking tell people that in the beginning that maybe, it was your fault to begin with and stop telling people to blame him cause you don deserve my fucking friendship, neither do you deserve ours. Up yours and up his too cause my friend don't deserve this shit from your family, nor you. And learn to fucking respect someone's son before karma bites you and your family in the ass.


I've got a vendetta against people like you. I do. NEVER, and I mean NEVER, make me hate you cause I'll bring the whole world down so I can bring you down.


Another hole to puncture in a guy's heart, another girl to show some respect to my friend and not backstab him any fucking more.

I'll bring the whole world down to fucking bring you down if I hate you both.


I love my friends too much to let anything happen to them. Go FUCK yourself. _|_

Everything happens for a reason. I belive whatever that has happened to me for the 22 years of my life can only make me a better person. I have friends who will always be there for me like how I will always be there for them. I talk and I open up more to people. I make friends easily and I'm not shy going about it. I have enemies. Enemies who probably hate me but they don't know that I hate them as much to the extent of hurting them.
I begin to make compulsive and immediate actions and I know I will never regret my actions.
I tell myself to do whatever the hell I want because I know I can and I will and I have been doing it. The only promise I have ever made to myself is never to look back and waste the energy to frown, cry, get mad, instead I'll walk straight and show the middle finger up high to the one's lagging behind because that is all they will ever receive from me ever again. But if they(the ones lagging behind) come and try blocking my way, all I can say is shit happens, and gtfo my way.


And that will be the promise of a lifetime. I've changed. And I belive I can be better for my friends, families, and you.


I miss all my friends. Sam, Syadie, Dzaf, Khus, Hanif, The PRCS, the firefighters, the bella luna's. Protect your friends.

Ok updates. I am Alif.


Who are you people again?

Today is the 6th birthday of my little princess.
No words can describe how much I miss you and I love you. Like I have told your mother, your grandmother, you will always be a daughter to me. And in the near future when you are in trouble and you think you are in trouble, always remember that you have a father inside of me that will always be loving and thinking of you 24/7.

Now make me proud and go out there and rule the school next year. I'll be there!
I love you Nurul Hazirah!
And Ayu, if you don't take care of her properly please remember I'll kill you.


Ok, have to go get ready for work.

You were the only face I'd ever known.
I was the light from the lamp on the floor,
and only as bright as you wanted me to be.
But I am no gentleman, I can be a prick,
and I do regret more than I admit.
You have been followed back to the same place
I sat with you drink for drink.
Take the pain out of love, and then love won't exist.

Everything we had, everything we had,
everything we had, everything we had
Is no longer there.

It was the only place I'd ever known.
Turned off the light on my way out the door.
I will be watching wherever you go,
through the eyes of a fly on the wall.
You have been followed back to the same place
I sat with you drink for drink.
Take the pain out of love and then love won't exist.

Everything we had, everything we had,
everything we had, everything we had
Is no longer there, longer there.

Well, you saw for yourself, the way it played out.
For you, I am blinded.
For you, I am blinded, for you.

I am no gentleman, I can be a prick.
And I do regret more than I admit.
You have been followed back to the same place
I sat with you drink for drink.
Take the pain out of love, and then love won't exist.

Everything we had, everything we had,
(you have been followed, you have been followed.)
everything we had, everything we had.
(you have been followed, you have been followed.)
Everything we had, everything we had,
(you have been followed, you have been followed.)
everything we had...

I'll be with you wherever you go,
through the eyes of a fly on the wall.

Marion is a pinoy engineer.
Alif is a singaporean technician operator... what more can you ask for.

Marion : Im bored lets take some pictures.
Alif : fuck off i want to sleep.
Marion : please alif so i can show my wife and kids.
Alif : putangenamo.
Marion : Chibai. Faster.
Alif : okay la cibai.


he says he will offer me a place to stay if i was ever to holiday. u fucking engineer, if you're reading this you owe me a pack of ciggs













now go and take this pictures before i delete em fucking engineer



ily

Time ran out.
As promised.